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Yar! It be another sweet Mocha Friday, not t...
October 30, 2009 by Adam in Family
 Yar! It be another sweet Mocha Friday, not to mention dressing like a pirate at work today. Emma put on her witch costume for school, so we had to pose for the camera.
The week has generally gone well. Sam had one day where he was a little sick and stayed home. Jamie took a day trip to Portland yesterday, with Josh entertaining the kids after school, much to their delight. I spent last night helping Sam with math and Emma with spelling. For bedtime I started reading Emma Harry Potter, and afterwards Sam and I played with the Dragon Age toolset building sunken ruins.
I need to sit down and spend some quality time with my loan application, but with luck there will soon be another big gob of cash put into our savings account. Once that's combined with the stocks cash-out, I think Jamie should have everything she needs to start looking for a house. I know she's nervous about moving out and worrying about a job. Mostly I'm trying to get everything in place for when she's ready.
Game night with Sadie was cut short due to sleep needed for our East Coast relatives. We might reschedule for this weekend. I was excited to hear that she and Greg would be coming to town towards the end of December.
As for the next few days, it turns out I have one more dance class tonight. Tomorrow I'm taking the kids Trick or Treating. Sometime I need to go to the library and maybe work on the compost tumbler. When I went over to dad and Jenny's on Wednesday, he helped cut a hole in the side. The rest is up to me.
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The week continues to zip along, already half...
October 28, 2009 by Adam in Family
The week continues to zip along, already half over.
Sam was home sick yesterday, with a touch of a cold and headache. Fortunately it wasn't particularly bad and he headed in today.
I ran into Jamie in the lobby this morning, waiting for her job interview, so I stopped and wished her luck. She's applying for a teaching position with PeaceHealth Laboratories in the building where I work. It's a good professional job that she's perfectly qualified for, so I think there's a reasonable chance of her getting it.
Having my ex-wife work in my same building sounds like good material for a sitcom, but I honestly hope she gets the job and it's unlikely we'd cross paths anyway. I had a good friend work in my same building for a year before we managed to see each other.
Jamie's off to Portland tomorrow. I've got Emma's costume ready for Friday's school party. Now I just need to make sure I have all the appropriate clothes, props, and tattoos for my pirate costume. I'll take any excuse to talk like a pirate for the day.
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It's Sunday morning, the kids are fed, the ki...
October 25, 2009 by Adam in Family
 It's Sunday morning, the kids are fed, the kitchen clean, laundry going, and the kids are playing with Legos. I managed to make hash browns and pancakes, along with a morning mocha. My wonderful kids assisted and generally stayed out of trouble. I think my favorite moment was finishing cleaning the kitchen and walking out to discover Sam and Emma brushing their teeth just as I'd asked them to. Ah, the joys of older children.
Friday night was my final swing dance class. I finally got the hang of the thing, doing inside turns and tuck turns without thinking about it much. Now I just need to practice more, or get a dance partner taller than Emma. Josh watched the kids while I was out, as Jamie went to the coast. They had such a good time that they demanded he return today.
Yesterday was a whirlwind of activity. After a crêpe-filled breakfast, we had my friend Joanna arrive with her husband and two kids in tow. Her husband is a glassblower, so the kids both got nifty glass flowers. The kids cheerfully played in the basement, then cheerfully played with playdough in the kitchen, and finally cheerfully drank tea and ate goodies.
Next I took Emma off to Isabella's birthday party. Initially she was hesitant to go, but perked right up once she arrived. Isabella's mom Heather was a whirlwind of frantic activity, managing to get the kids doing balloon-carrying races, dress-up, piñata whacking, cake, and present opening. Emma returned home with more presents than she arrived with.
We had some down time after that and then headed out a final time to pumpkin carving at Jason and Bridget's house. All sorts of old friends were there, including BJ and her family. The kids had a pretty good time and ate a surprising amount of food. Again, they returned with prizes and collapsed at home after a quick bath.
Josh is on his way over and the plan is to take it easy today. I've got assorted domestic chores to do and hopefully can find a few moments to simply enjoy life in between all the things that must be done. Playing in my garden sounds like a fine idea.
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Mocha Friday already, though I'm still patien...
October 23, 2009 by Adam in Family
 Mocha Friday already, though I'm still patiently waiting until I head into work. Somehow oatmeal with raisins doesn't quite compare.
The week seems to have gone so fast. Jamie's off to the beach this weekend, Josh is coming over for pizza and Mythbusters, and it's my last dance class tonight. Saturday is filled to the gills with play dates, birthday parties, and pumpkin carving. Sunday is more of a laid back day for us, just hanging out with the kids. Maybe I can sneak a library run in there somewhere.
Life's been going relatively well. The dividing of assets has started in earnest, with two really big checks arriving from the sale of our stocks. The money's from some gifts that my grandparents gave us when my grandfather was dying. It probably wasn't their intent to help us divorce well later in life, but without it I probably couldn't have kept the house. So thanks, Dorothy and Franklin.
The mortgage refinance is next. I basically have to gather up paperwork and make it happen. After that, the bulk of our assets should be ready for dividing. All that remains is adjusting our retirement funds, which can only happen after we get legally separated or divorced. I suspect we'll do a final calculation with the accountant to come up with a number, and then hold off until we're formally divorced to make it happen.
The next big thing is talking to the kids when Jamie starts looking for a new house. I've been generally okay emotionally for a couple weeks now, and I know the kids haven't had the same time to adjust to things. It could be a little rough, especially when Jamie finally gets a new place.
Even though there's a lot of hard things going on, the kids and I continue to have fun, Jamie and I seem to be working well together, and I'm optimistic for the future. Especially the café mocha in my future. I can taste it now.
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It's Monday night, Emma's in the bath, and Sa...
October 20, 2009 by Adam in Family
It's Monday night, Emma's in the bath, and Sam's helping her with her spelling homework. Tonight when I came home, Emma dropped to her knees, exclaimed "All hail Daddy!" and began worshiping. I have great kids.
Sunday wasn't quite as busy as the day before. Jamie had the kids in the morning after breakfast, so I went food shopping, stopped at the library, and did some miscellaneous chores. Jamie returned with Emma and went back to M's house until late afternoon. Emma and I had a wonderful time working in the garden. I did a little bit of work towards the new garden plan, but there are still endless projects to work on.
This morning Jamie and I went to the counselor and later to the accountant. There were no huge surprises. The monthly amount I'm paying Jamie initially is higher than expected, but as part of the initial division I'm getting a little more savings than expected. The first couple years will end up being pretty tight, but hopefully we can get through it. It's still a little tricky with the assumptions of job and salary and when she'll move out, so adjustments are to be expected. As for me, the next step is to sell our stocks and work on getting the house refinanced. Relatively soon, there should be a big chunk of change for Jamie to work with.
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What a day! After breakfast, the kids and I ...
October 17, 2009 by Adam in Family
What a day! After breakfast, the kids and I dug into the Halloween decoration box. Soon we had dangling skeletons and jars of odd potions scattered around the house. I'm going as a pirate to work on Halloween. Since bringing the flintlock rifle could possibly result in my dismissal, I opted for one of Sam's foam swords. We had a broken one, which I repaired, spray painted, and added some leather to. The kids thought it immediately awesome. Sam wasn't keen on going to the pumpkin patch, so Emma and I headed out to Thistledown Farms. The rain was monumental and we wisely opted to take the horse-drawn carriage out to the pumpkin patch. I think it took as long to wash off the mud as it did to pick the pumpkins, but we both had a memorable time. Upon coming home, Sam was off at a friend's birthday party so Emma and I diligently worked at apple sauce production. It was a tremendous amount of work and we ended up with only five large jars as the output. Perhaps next time I'll use industrial vats to get the right economy of scale. Now Josh is over, trying to kill the children with foam swords. I promised him zombie-themed games, so we'll probably head up to play Give Me The Brain or Zombie Fluxx. Life's good.
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I just downed my Mocha Friday beverage and I ...
October 16, 2009 by Adam in Family
 I just downed my Mocha Friday beverage and I feel the liquid optimism coursing through my veins. Life continues to be both hard and wonderful. Occasionally things between Jamie and I are awkward, but we're also working well together to take care of the kids and get through the business of getting separated and divorced. I've spent the last few days trying to figure out all the mortgage issues and trying to understand what all the fees mean. Monday we have another counseling session and meet with our CPA to go over finances.
Emma was going to go up to Portland to visit her grandma, but Judy hurt her back and so we've postponed the trip. I'd planned a boys-only Saturday night with Sam and Josh playing zombie games. I'm trying to think of ways to work Emma into some of that without getting her too freaked out before bed time. Give Me the Brain is a funny card game that Emma would probably enjoy. Left 4 Dead, not so much.
As usual, I looked through Eugene Weekly, trying to come up with things to do. I think I'll take Emma to a farm to get apples and pumpkins, one for applesauce and another for carving. I like the idea of Halloween projects, from picture frames with moving images to apothecary jars filled with strange things. In years past, they've loved doing that. Between the two of them, they've started a perfume making business, mixing strange things about the house in hopes of making their fortune. Maybe some of those odd tinctures can be put into cleverly labeled jars.
I had my second to last organic gardening class on Wednesday, which is endlessly inspiring. I'm feeling the urge to make cedar raised beds and a compost tumbler. My dance class is tonight, and I'm hoping my ankle will cooperate. Both finish at the end of the month, so I'll need to find other things to do with my Wednesday and Friday nights. Perhaps I'll just keep that time open and work on house projects or visit with people as desired. It's been good for me to stay busy, but I'm also noticing I don't have a lot of free time.
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Emma and I made applesauce tonight, using equ...
October 14, 2009 by Adam in Family
 Emma and I made applesauce tonight, using equipment borrowed from a friend at work. It generally worked out pretty well, and the kids seemed enthusiastic enough about the taste that I may make up a bigger batch this weekend.
I had a bit of a fall Monday at work. I was getting out of an office chair and my leg fell asleep. Moments later I put my weight on it, rolled my ankle, and fell down hard on my butt. My coworkers were great, getting me an ice pack and endless sympathy. I managed to get to the gym both days, but no running for awhile. Sitting has been uncomfortable today, bothering me more than my ankle. Hopefully I'll be mended enough for my Friday dance class.
Jamie and I continue to work together to take care of all the things we're supposed to be doing. She's looking hard for work, which she reports as not being frustrating yet. I've been working to fill out paperwork for both my mortgage broker and the CPA.
Neither has been done yet, as Jamie and I briefly went over finances, I ran a new network cable to Sam's computer, and then I had the kids full time. I conked out when putting Emma to bed, woke up enough to eat cereal, and now I'm going to crawl under the covers myself.
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The weekend is coming to a close, Emma's asle...
October 12, 2009 by Adam in Family
 The weekend is coming to a close, Emma's asleep and Sam's reading a Batman reference book.
This morning we had crepes and Jamie and I went over finances. Everything is extremely preliminary, but I think we can just barely afford paying two mortgages, utilities, food, and all the other necessities of life (including TV and Internet) for the near future. True, we won't have any savings to speak of and things like vacations are postponed, but at least we won't be starving with our children in burlap clothes. Jamie and I have been working well together on these sort of issues, which makes me hopeful that we'll continue to be good co-parents in the years ahead.
Emma decided to cut a couple holes in a sheet for a traditional ghost costume. We'll see if this supplants the black cat she's been for the last few years.
I went off for a hair cut and grocery shopping, and then Jamie went off to Corvallis to meet with Carrie. The kids were playing really well together in the back yard, hunting for bugs, burning things with a magnifying glass, and generally enjoying being kids. I weeded like a maniac, filling our yard debris bin with all manner of invasive plants. I hopefully made some sketches of the back yard, trying to figure out where to put raised beds and plant flowers.
Afterward, Emma and I made a library run and then practiced more bike riding at the park. As evening rolled around, the kids had quiet time and I whipped up some dinner while they did battle in the basement with foam swords. Next came chores and home work. Emma did great with her spelling words, mostly thanks to Sam who practiced with her the day before.
Now the house is quiet and work starts tomorrow. I'm not sure if I want to do something frivolous or curl up in bed with the Good Divorce book. Ah, decisions.
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We had quite the busy day today
October 11, 2009 by Adam in Family
We had quite the busy day today. It's nine o'clock and already I'm tuckered out.
Jamie made pancakes for us this morning and headed off to the gym. I dragged out the ping pong table and we played until it was time to go to Rewild. It's a "back to nature" group and they had an assortment of activities going on. Sam caught swords (bamboo Kendo ones), tied ropes, and tried to start a fire using friction. Emma and I tried acorn flour pancakes which I thought were pretty good.
After that we headed home and Sam went off to a Percy Jackson themed birthday party at Zack's house. Emma and I made sourdough bread and hamburger buns, measured the backyard in preparation for garden planning (semi-homework for my Wednesday class), and then went to Saturday Market to pick up produce. Emma is a treat to hang out with, and we ate noodles and picked up all manner of tasty vegetables.
We returned home, got Sam, and started getting ready for dinner. Dave, Kirsten, and Josh arrived and mightily entertained the kids while I got everything ready. Dave graciously made the hamburgers as I think it's been over twenty years since I cooked meat.
We ate outside on the patio, and the food turned out well. After dinner we hung up an old sheet and Dave set up the LCD projector and laptop. From the kitchen, you could look out the window and it looked like the Canadian Rockies were right outside the window. In reality, it was just the wallpaper from Dave's laptop.
We watched Pixar movies to everyone's amusement, and then I got Emma into a quick bath and bed. Emma was amazed by the stars as it's been awhile since she's been outside in the dark. Now it's late and I'm feeling pretty worn out. Time for bed soon.
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It's another sweet Mocha Friday and the antic...
October 09, 2009 by Adam in Family
 It's another sweet Mocha Friday and the anticipation of that delicious elixir is palpable. Only a half an hour to go. As soon as I came home, I was on kid duty, though it wasn't particularly difficult. Sam played his new Batman game and I helped Emma draw scientific illustrations of imaginary animals. After dinner we had game night with Sadie and Greg. The kids both love playing charades, which is an easy choice when we haven't prepared much. As we were winding down for bed, I pointed out that Emma had her first list of spelling words to practice. That seemed to invigorate both of the kids and soon Sam was helping with her homework as she took a bath. It was one of those awesome parent moments when I was proud of both of them simultaneously. For those of you hoping to lurk about my house and plot my demise, the robot should be currently active. I upgraded the netbook to Windows 7 and the whole setup is a little twitchy, but it generally seems to work.
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The kids had Jog-a-Thon today at school, rais...
October 08, 2009 by Adam in Family
The kids had Jog-a-Thon today at school, raising money for their art and music programs. I ended up running with Emma, or at least alternating running and limping. I think she drank a bit too much water and ended up with a side ache towards the end. Still, she ran more than two miles and felt pretty good at the end. I saw Sam briefly as he zipped about, giving him a macho fist bump before I left. The school took some pictures, which you can see here.
Jamie and I went over our assorted "to do" lists this morning. Next step is to get our house appraised and contact a CPA to go over how to best divide up all our assets. I also asked Jamie to make a list of all our furniture and mark which ones she wanted. There are still plenty of unknowns, and there aren't any firm timelines, but I think we're doing all the things we're supposed to be doing.
 
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The weekend is drawing to a close (though t...
October 05, 2009 by Adam in Family
 The weekend is drawing to a close (though the thought makes Sam very unhappy). This morning Jamie made crepes and then took the kids swimming and to lunch. I had a leisurely trip to the library, returning with countless goodies for the kids and gardening books for me. I did some laundry, made lunch, worked on getting the robot functional, and then the kids descended on me once again. Jamie helped M buy remodeling stuff, Emma watched a movie, and Sam and I played Left 4 Dead. Fighting off zombie hordes creates a very special father-son bond. Our neighbors brought over pumpkin pie, which we promptly ate. Next we headed to the Asian kite festival to make kites and enjoy the music. The kids had a great time running around and listening to the drums. Emma hit the 14 second mark riding alone. Since then, we've been taking it easy. Dinner will be soon, and then the typical bedtime routine. Just the way I like it.
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It was a pretty low-key day with the kids today
October 04, 2009 by Adam in Family
 It was a pretty low-key day with the kids today. Jamie made breakfast this morning, then went to the gym and later to M's for the rest of the day. Sam was feeling a little draggy, possibly due to an impending cold. We played cards and puttered around until close to noon, then Emma and I went to the park for a picnic and bike riding. She hit a new record of twelve seconds solo riding.
Upon our return, Sam was wanting to play on the computer with me, so it was quiet time for Emma while the two of us had some bonding time. Afterward, the kids played with walkie-talkies and ran about the house while I did some cleaning in the basement.
As the afternoon wore on, I took the kids outside for some sun. They decided to script their own fight scenes, then act them out for me. Evidently this one kick of Emma's was so powerful, it caused purple bolts of energy to shoot from Sam's head. Well, at least that's what showed up on the camera.
We then went to Yayoe's for dinner. It's always nostalgic for me to go to that house. I don't know how many countless meals I've had with the old clock ticking away. After that it was baths and bedtime snacks and stories. Emma's getting quite good at reading, and cheerfully read a Doctor Seuss book to me without hardly a mistake.
My ballroom dancing class went relatively well. It was two other couples, myself, and the two instructors. I got a fair bit of individual attention from the woman instructor, which was nice. It was a very different style than my college class, but I think I'm picking it up quickly. I'm still trying to figure out if this is something I want to turn into a regular hobby.
We'll see what tomorrow brings. If the weather holds, I'd like to take them to the Asian kite festival at the nearby park.
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It's another sweet Mocha Friday, not to menti...
October 02, 2009 by Adam in Family
 It's another sweet Mocha Friday, not to mention Pizza and Mythbusters Friday and Swing Dance Lesson Friday. It's my first class tonight, something I haven't done in twenty years. We'll see if I remember any of the moves. Everyone was pretty tired last night. Emma in particular seemed to be having a hard time of it. After her bath, she threw a huge fit. Jamie and I have been trying to get to the point where either parent could get her to bed, but Emma wasn't cooperating very well. After Jamie read bedtime stories, I got called in to settle her down. Maybe we'll try getting Emma to sleep together, and get her to the point when either of us can get her to sleep. To top it off, Emma had a dream that vampires killed Sam, so we went downstairs this morning to ensure he was still alive. Still, Emma is also adjusting relatively well to school. She's doing great with her reading and writing, amazing me with her ability to read an entire book to me. She's starting to make friends at school and I think her recesses aren't as lonely as when school first started. Sam, of course, is a trooper when it comes to school. He's got the routine down and has a good group of friends. Last night he was saying how he and his friends had memorized the lyrics to The Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny. He's quite good at getting through tough times with his good sense of humor. I'm feeling strangely optimistic today, perhaps because the future is seeming more clear. Even though change is coming, it's not as scary as it once seemed. Jamie is very organized and loves the kids, so she'll make a good co-parent even if we live in different houses. The thought of having time without the kids started getting me excited about the thought of house projects, setting up a garden, and maybe joining a local hiking group. We'll see where my interests fall. In terms of the weekend, it looks a little dreary weather-wise. We're having dinner with Yayoe this Saturday and there's a kite flying celebration on Sunday. I'd love to get Emma riding her bike, though it may end up as a mud derby. Maybe we can hang out, watch movies, and make bread and soup. Of course, according to Emma's weather report, we could be seeing sun, rain, and snow, perhaps at the same time:
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